May
16
Captain Victoria said a whole cacapoopoo of stuff this week that I don't believe for a minute she actually meant.
The twiggie wannabe is promoting her new 'dVb jeans' line by going around London saying a bunch of mean things about herself, apparently because she figures that if it's gonna be said she might as well beat the tabloids to it.
Her top three, supplemented by yours truly:
1. She calls herself unattractive to the opposite sex. 'All the men that like me are gay. It’s true.'
You need some more bait for that fishing pole, Vicki?
While I like the implications of this - such as my boyfriend David Beckham becoming fully available - I'm gonna have to call your bluff Victoria, and ask you to cut the crap.
2. She brushes off her vain, rehearsed pouty look as accidental. 'When I see pictures I do sometimes think, 'You miserable cow.' I think it's just the way my face falls.'
Please lady. We all know this is really about your bad teeth.
3. 'If people like the way I look then great, and if they don't then fine.'
The verdict is in and I'm gonna have to call bullshit on that one too.
If there was a number four, it would entail Posh calling herself a 'bloated pig' who eats McDonald's and only spends 15 minutes getting ready every day.
Pictures of the narcissist in London (managing a half smile in the second photo) after the jump...
The twiggie wannabe is promoting her new 'dVb jeans' line by going around London saying a bunch of mean things about herself, apparently because she figures that if it's gonna be said she might as well beat the tabloids to it.
Her top three, supplemented by yours truly:
1. She calls herself unattractive to the opposite sex. 'All the men that like me are gay. It’s true.'
You need some more bait for that fishing pole, Vicki?
While I like the implications of this - such as my boyfriend David Beckham becoming fully available - I'm gonna have to call your bluff Victoria, and ask you to cut the crap.
2. She brushes off her vain, rehearsed pouty look as accidental. 'When I see pictures I do sometimes think, 'You miserable cow.' I think it's just the way my face falls.'
Please lady. We all know this is really about your bad teeth.
3. 'If people like the way I look then great, and if they don't then fine.'
The verdict is in and I'm gonna have to call bullshit on that one too.
If there was a number four, it would entail Posh calling herself a 'bloated pig' who eats McDonald's and only spends 15 minutes getting ready every day.
Pictures of the narcissist in London (managing a half smile in the second photo) after the jump...
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